I was speaking with one of my Moon Goddess fertility clients the other day. She’s preparing for her first IVF next month and understandably she’s got mixed feelings.
Lisa (her name has been changed to protect her privacy) was really hoping that insemination would work. But after 3 cycles, her doctor strongly suggests she move on to IVF asap. Because of her age (she’s 41), she feels pressured to take the next step even if she’s not completely comfortable with the procedure or the cost.
Maybe you can relate?
But Lisa’s situation is probably different from yours in one major way. Her partner is a woman. So they can’t just relax and let it happen. It won’t be an accident. No, making their baby must be a very conscious and deliberate process; and one that takes place in a clinic.
So as she shared her story with me, I listened deeply and offered my support. And then Lisa said something to me that really caught my attention: That she’s trying to “let go and accept that it may not happen.”
It was a big aha moment for both of us. Because Lisa thought ‘accepting that it may not happen’ was the same as ‘letting go’.
But it’s not. It’s completely different.
When you let go, a wave of surrender washes over you. It feels effortless and comes with a sense of peace. Like the saying ‘letting go and letting God’, it’s combination of faith and trust and allowing. There is no stress.
But ‘accepting that something may not happen’ is not letting go. In fact, it’s preparing yourself for the worst case scenario.
So consider this instead…
What if you allowed yourself to get excited? How would it feel let the joy back into making a baby whether it’s in your bedroom or at the clinic?
Can you imagine feeling happy and hopeful again?
Whether you’re trying to conceive with a male or female partner, at the clinic or at home, I can’t stress enough how important it is that you STOP preparing yourself for disappointment. Because as Henry Hartman says, “success happens when preparation meets opportunity.”
So please, prepare yourself for success.
Especially if you’ve experienced losses or multiple cycles that haven’t resulted in pregnancy. You need nurturing. You need to restore faith in your female body and believe that you’re meant to be a mother. That’s the most important kind of preparation you can do for pregnancy.